Christian Sex: How Often Should Married Couples Do It?


This is a very difficult question, as there will be seasons of marriage where sex should be more frequent...and seasons where a couple may have “dry spells.”

The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 7, “Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” It is clear that we are more open to temptation as husbands and wives when we are abstaining for too long in our marital intimacy. This is likely why pornography and even adultery are, sadly, infiltrating even the most seemingly robust Christian marriages.

The interesting thing is that God has almost created a "timer" for sexual intimacy. For women who are not aware, men actually become physically uncomfortable with the seminal volume (similar to a breastfeeding mother that has waited too long to to pump/feed) after about three days without release.

For these reasons, it is probably best to plan to be intimate at least once a day, and, as occasions arise, abstain a day or two. (Of course, some couples will be having sex at more frequency than that, but it seems to be a good general rule to follow.) For days when intercourse is not possible or uncomfortable (illness, menstrual cycle, separated by distance, etc.), high tech devices can bring fun and fulfillment to the marriage bed!

Honor God. Honor your spouse. Enjoy the gift!